OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
