we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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