i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize
