ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
