Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
i now understand why vodka
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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