i would punch a child for taco bell
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
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