he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
We are two peas in an std pod
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
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