It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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