i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
