4 words: hood of his car
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
