I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
