He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
