put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
True strength comes from lack of pants
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Randomize
