I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
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