Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
