Everything about him screamed your future.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
