I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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