guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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