My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
