I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
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