I'm going to jail i love you
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Randomize