you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize