So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
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