is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
