Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize