why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
