I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize
