Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize