summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Randomize
