I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize