What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
