I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize