I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Randomize
