seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
