birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.