Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering