Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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