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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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