Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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