Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
