Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
