Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(586): View more from Michigan

matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.

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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

and on the seventh day, God created megan fox

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(540): View more from Virginia

she says it's "been amazing lately"

(540): View more from Virginia

i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half

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(504): View more from Louisiana

Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please

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(703): View more from Virginia

Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?

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(859): View more from Kentucky

When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"

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(207): View more from Maine

You left your hot dogs in my dresser again

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(503): View more from Oregon

I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.

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