I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
