i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
These People Made Expensive Mistakes That They’ll Regret Forever
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Things The Opposite Sex Just Doesn’t Understand
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.