I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I need a beard to bite.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize