Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
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