If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
