I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
