on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize
