I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
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i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
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