This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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