adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
